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January 13, 2012

Crucial and Important Infor… Ooh, Squirrel

By cdpoe

so, i was talking with someone the other day about various and sundry things, over coffee at the local coffeeshop.  hot shots java is the joint and it is located down on the main strip of Poulsbo, WA.  great coffee, excellent service, and wonderful ambience.  but i digress.  we were discussing some of the challenges she was facing while providing live-in care for someone.  she was describing some of the latest incidences with their charge, and i made the comment “ah, so the ‘squirrel’ moments are becoming more and more frequent”.  she laughed and said “honey, she’s running with the squirrels”.  i had to struggle from alternately choking on and spewing dark chocolate mocha through my nose.  to some, this begs a little explanation.

a couple years ago, Pixar released one of their best films yet called ‘Up’.  for those who haven’t seen it, it is a cute film, and showed an incredible amount of talent in my opinion.  the first 10-15 minutes of the movie tells one of the most beautiful love stories, without words, just simple animation, and moves anyone i’ve watched it with to tears.  it’s fantastic just to watch for that bit.  the rest that follows is fantastical, heart-warming, funny, and a bit ridiculous (in the best sense).  at one point, the main characters come across a dog that wears an electronic collar that allows the dog to “talk”.  the hyper-ecstatic ramblings that emit from the collar are exactly what i believe a dog  truly is trying to say as it frenetically wags its tail and bounces around.  at one point, in the middle of his diatribe, he looks in the complete opposite direction, and says “SQUIRREL!”… then immediately reverts back to what he was saying.  in otherwords, he was distracted by something off in the distance, then re-focused on his conversation.

it’s amazing how something so small and brief can become part of one’s lexicon, especially by becoming a part of a culture’s lexicon.  it wasn’t long until many people i knew were using the “squirrel” expression to chide someone for deviating from the conversation or getting distracted from the task at hand.  and yet, it speaks to something deeply ingrained in our personalities and our make-up on how we communicate as beings.  i remember growing up and being somewhat easily distracted, having someone say to me “oooh, shiny”, as if to say a shiny object caught my attention.  or saying “oooh, look, bird…”, again denoting the distraction by something else attention getting.  it’s something we’ve all been guily of at some point or another, and there’ve been countless ways of laughingly pointing it out.

what was i saying?  oh yeah.  squirrel.

“running with the squirrels” is now my favorite way of saying someone who chronically suffers from attention deficit in situations.  it’s really catchy.  and the thing i like about it is the visual.  can you picture it?  someone running with a herd (herd?  what is a large group of squirrels called?) of squirrels, chittering about, and collecting nut-like objects.  awesome.

 

so.  squirrel.  running with squirrels.  he/she who runs with squirrels.  check it.

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January 6, 2012

Explanation and Elaboration

By cdpoe

(being an excerpt of “Scientia, Machina et Esoterica” from the “Chronicles of the Black Book”)

it has been argued vehemently by many as to when science and religion found common bearing and acceptance with one another. it is generally accepted that during the Dark Ages very little ground was gained towards this end *, and in fact, much was lost. ironically, it was probably the closest man had come to reviving it’s connection to a naturalistic order of things. the commoner’s close ties to land and hearth lent itself to adhering almost fanatically to the Old Ways, however dictated by their region and cultural upbringing. a deistic representation of natural order was prevalent among the peoples. gods, goddesses, sprites, gnomes, faerie, and more were equated to land, wood, lake, fen, river, sky, and the deeps of the earth. views long held by ancestral heritage, passed down through oral tradition (and in rare cases, written), became the doctrine by which the majority of the peoples lead their lives by. a brief explanation is needed to put these practices in context with theory which is understood in this Enlightened Age.

the spiritual and natural realms are inextricably interlinked with one another, woven together in a complex pattern of belief and practice. what one does in the physical realm has direct effect and impact upon the esoteric, for good or ill. the first of law of thermodynamics states energy is neither created or destroyed under normal circumstances (emphasis on ‘normal’). it is merely transferred from one form to another. thus, a physical reaction which generates energy (kinetic or otherwise) does not dissipate or subside when the tangible results in the earthly realm conclude. it transfers itself to the spiritual or esoteric realms by way of what many refer to as the Veil, that which separates the known physical realms from the the non-physical realms (elemental, celestial, etc). willful intent from the deliverer of said physical reaction guides this transference, providing a pathway for it to follow. here is where the arguments of “black magic” vs. “white magic” arise, mainly from those either intentionally or unintentionally ignorant of the fact that energy is in and of itself neutral of purpose. positive and negative descriptors refer only to their natural reactions in the physical realms (positive and negative ions, positively or negatively charged, etc) and have no relevance to the wielding of said energies from a thaumaturgical perspective. good vs. evil, morality vs. immorality, all of this is secondary and is radically subjective from person to person. this is a subject explored later in it’s entirety; in the meantime, we shall continue to explore the topic at hand.

as is common with much of human-kind’s history, during the era of the Dark Ages, man was his own greatest ally in coming closest to his roots… and ultimately his greatest enemy. the Church** was rising in power and wished to become the predominant power and source of spirituality for all of man, for the “common good and salvation of the inherently wicked human soul”. it must be made clear this was doctrine established for man, by man and has no reflection on Christianity itself nor the deities and beings that represent it. the argument of “divine intervention” in this doctrine’s creation, such as man’s hand being “guided by the hand of God” has been proven and shown to be a fallacy. in point of fact, the Church has declared as much in recent decree (some minority zealous factions oppose this). a monk of holy order in the late 15th century once stated “religion itself in it’s pure form, neither good nor evil, is a beauteous thing to behold… it would be perfection indeed, were it not for the interference and intercessions of man”. the religious entities defined here and further in this Chronicle must be viewed as separate from the dogma established by human factions representing them in the physical realm. much of the esoteric realms cannot be clearly comprehended by man, and thus are misinterpreted and misunderstood when conveyed to man by these representatives. the natural order of things can appear to function differently in these realms than in the earthly realm.

as a result of human-kind’s own limitations, there were factions within the Church that sought to dominate and control the perceptions of the esoteric. masquerading as a force “in the name of God”, mass persecutions called inquisitions enforced this will upon the peoples across the land. there were 7 major inquisitions from roughly 1000 – 1700 CE (common era). all had roots in social and political agendas, having very little to do with preservation of faith and belief itself. the goals of said inquisitions were motivated by gain for the Church, which amassed political power and wealth with each subsequent major inquisition. people across the known world acquiesced from “pagan belief and base superstition” to “rejoicing in the word of the one true God, the Almighty”. church buildings and structures were erected in places of power identified by those of the Old Ways, the purpose of which was a not so symbolic gesture of dominance and superiority over the “primitive and unnatural”. in point of fact, by what has been explained above, it was simply another “perspective”, a different interpretation of said energies, a different path leading ultimately to the same source of the esoteric, the divine. unfortunately, the intent behind it was sullied by man’s greed, and as a result, the manifestations of this interpretation had dire consequences. deaths of innocents resulted, mid-wives and other practitioners of natural remedy, homeopathic methodology and naturalism executed for their “heresy against God”. the claim by some neo-pagan fanatics of contemporary times of “9 million european woman” dying is erroneous, exaggerated. this is due to the fact that that figure equates to far more than the entire population of europe as a whole during this period. however, it is documented and now acknowledged by the Church such atrocities occurred and many innocents were executed.

many people incorporated the Christian doctrine and dogma into their ages old practices, a thinly veiled disguise of the Old Ways to avoid persecution and punishment. Indeed, even the Church itself adopted many practices and holy-days as their own, to encourage conversion to the New Ways and to demonstrate a certain degree of tolerance (arguably, a very limited tolerance at that). Myths and legends of old became prominent figures in Christian holy-day observance. examples include but are not limited to the observance of the winter solstice (Yule) becoming the birth time and celebration of the Christ coming into the world (Christ Mass, or Christmas). What better time to introduce the Christ, Saviour of All, than the season acknowledged by the Old Ways as the time when the old god is preparing to ascend from the deeps of the underworld. trappings for the Christmas of the New Ways include evergreen boughs lit with candles and ornamented in celebration, traditional in many old Germanic traditions. old gods are represented as saints, bringing comfort and gifts to the peoples on the eve of the Christmas, common in both old world Slavic and Germanic traditions. if anything, the merging of old and new was representative of the inherent need to acknowledge each path one pursued to spiritual fulfillment or enlightenment was merely a different interpretation of the energies utilized in said pursuit. the only barrier to this was human kind’s base denial of this truth on the grounds of control… and fear of the unknown or unexplained.

after centuries of inquisition for the pursuit of eradicating heresy, in whatever form it reared it’s vile head, the Church embarked upon it’s most ambitious endeavour in the late 18th century. it was known as the Lamias Crusade. the latin word ‘lamia’ translates to “witch” or “vampire”, also used to generally describe the demonic in old latin Church documents. this crusade was launched in the wake of the publication of Thomas Paine’s ‘the age of reason’, which marked a critical and pivotal point in the history of humankind. the Lamias Crusade marked a last ditch attempt by the Church to finally eliminate “the profane,the heretical and the unnatural”. it was a long and violent struggle for power…

<<<end of transcript>>>

 

* referring, of course, from an historical perspective of indo-european peoples. in asian cultures, for example, many cultural practices derive from a strong reverence and belief in the ties of the natural and spiritual realms.

** referring to Christianity and it’s associated Church

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January 6, 2012

the Powers That Be

By cdpoe

(being an excerpt from “Arcane Confliction” in the ‘Chronicles of the Black Book’…)

the celestial wars is a crude yet apt name given to the conflicts which arose between the major (and some minor) factions of the earthly and esoteric realms.  some reason it was all meant to be, was foretold it would come to pass by divine will.  others maintain it was a series of events that triggered the inevitable outcomes which made up the collective body of this conflict.  still others deign to suggest that what is will be as it should be because that is how it is.  whatever the reason for the celestial wars’ beginnings, all agree the final outcome changed the known realms and impacted all those that follow.

one must understand some basics about the make-up of the factions in order to get an idea of the far=reaching impact these conflagrations had on everything.  to understand the principles involved is to understand some of the why’s and provide the ability to prevent such things from happening once more. a  trite mortal saying is “those that do not know history are doomed to repeat it”. apt, if not crudely worded.

there are three loose categories the powers that be fall into.  the first are the celestial powers.  second are the elemental powers. and finally, the third grouping, the under dark. the more arcane terms for each, respectively, are principia celesti, principia rerum, and principia abyssum. each group has a hierarchy of powers within: the prima, majora, and minor arcana.  sub-categories, classifications and definitions by religion or pantheon exist, but only in the terms of the mortal races.  the factions themselves are not defined by this methodology, and amongst themselves are not divided as such. they do, however, draw power from the followers of such pantheistic worship, and will respond accordingly. the larger the faith base, the more intent the focus and power base.  they will appear and conform to the rudimentary aspects of each pantheon in order to satisfy the visceral aspects of the mortal races.  if one expects to see an all powerful  entity with horns, blazing eyes, and lightning surrounding them, that is what will appear upon summoning.  it’s all about evoking a strong emotional connection between the spiritual and the physical in order to channel power.

the celestial powers would contain those the mortal races have defined as “gods of the heavens”.  dods, goddesses, demi-gods and goddeses, all that have been classified as such for millenia of mortal man’s reckoning. angels, archangels, guardians, and other spiritual “creatures of the heavens” would fall within this category.  as mentioned prior, they would be grouped into prime, major, and minor groupings. outside pantheistic groupings by the mortal races, as a whole they are divided more by a caste system based upon power, age, and other factors. not much is known about the internal workings of the celestials outside mortal definitions.  it appears more fluid and fluctuates based upon the rising and falling of belief systems, religions, and faiths within the mortal realms.

the elemental powers are more closely tied to the physical realms by definition of ‘element’. they embody aspects of the things that make up the physical realms, the core elementia of the physical.  the core five are incendia (fire), aqueus (water), terra (earth), aeris (air), and spiritus (spirit).  the element of spirit is arguably the most enigmatic and least tied to the physical. but as any physical being would have to concede to, what is the physical without anima, the life-force that drives it?  what is sentience without the core “spirit” within that makes it so?  from the lowliest animal to the most intelligent creature, there is a fundamental aspect at the core of it’s being which drives it. some define it as the soul. either way, it is a core component, an element, of being.  each element has prime, major, and minor arcana ascribed to it.  there are some beings of air that are often mistaken for celestials, being they are perceived as “from the heavens” by their aerial qualities.  there are distinctions between celestials and aerial elementals, but not many known to the mortal races.  a “bleeding” or crossing of the lines from one to the other is inevitable.

finally, there are those of the under dark, or the abyssal powers.  the principia abyssum have their prime, major and minor arcana as well.  these are creatures ascribed to “underworld” realms, beings of darker aspect and intent in many pantheons. they draw their powers from both the physical and esoteric realms.  these powers are the most misunderstood based upon centuries, if not millenia, of propaganda epitomizing them as ‘evil’.  good and eveil are quaint  terms invented solely by the mortal races to define the outcomes of will and intent. they are wholly and completely subjective, as is evidenced by countless events in the histories of mortals.  while one event is classified as “evil” by one group, it is heralded as the “greatest of good” to another.  will and intent determines outcome, influences events, and quantifies action.  the abyssal powers can have minor associations with the elements, though they are not elementals themselves by nature.many urban creatures aligned with the under dark are warped elementals.  concrete, steel, glass, all are warped aspects of their core elemental natures (earth, fire, and air). they are not “true elementals” and therefore become aligned with the abyssal powers.

a true mapping of the celestial, elemental, and abyssal realms does not exist to anyone’s knowledge, and very few details exist regarding them, even in the Chronicles of the Black Book.  they’re very existence changes over time and fluctuates in direct correlation to the rise and fall of belief systems within the physical realms.

there are many poets and writers who were attuned to this fact, and outlined the “rules” by which one accorded (or denied) power to these beings.  many of these rules were ritualistic in nature, for symbols in both thought and action hold power in the esoteric realms.  in a quaint children’s tale, one was told to recite their belief in the being over and over to prevent the creature’s existence from fading.  in other folk tales, mortals were told to walk around things thrice, or leave tokens of symbolic meaning to prevent or induce an action.  at one point, a noble race of elemental being known by many names, but most commonly the Fae or Faerie, were quite a powerful force.  mortal races across the earthly realm held belief in various aspects of their being.  as centuries passed, another celestial being gained popularity among the masses; massive places of worship were constructed.  many of these were built over elemental power centers, physical “poolings” and collections of energy in the earthly realms (some call these “ley lines”).  as people gathered to worship, their will and intent focused the energies towards the celestials, away from the elementals.  a clever method of propaganda ascribing aspects of the elemental race to their own celestials caused belief in the celestials to increase exponentially. creatures of the fae once revered by the people became saints or angels, aspects of the elemental creatures became defined in the terms of the celestials.  will and intent upon a belief in something shifted from the elementals’ power base to the celestials’ power base.  the Fae fell into obscurity outside tale and mythology, a mere shadow of their former glory.  that is not to say they do not or can not wield incredible power over their adversaries within the other factions. they simply do not command as much of a presence in the physical realms, their foothold weakened outside of a few groupings of mortals.  but nature requires balance.  the large power base the celestials have acquired cenetered  around a monotheistic figure of primarily male energy aspects goes against that balance.

nature finds ways of righting discrepancies.

 

 

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November 20, 2011

the morning’s star

By cdpoe

“you truly are beautiful, starr” mr. raingstromn said softly.

startled, she looked up at him. she felt her cheeks flush slightly and winced, trying to hide her reaction. she wasn’t very successful. the pen jerked in her hand, and the ink jutted upward like the spike of an EKG monitor. she almost knocked the ink bottle from it’s holder on the desk as well. she looked up, her large eyes wide, and grabbed at a strand of black hair caught in her lashes. gods, she must look like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming truck. she laughed nervously, looking away as suddenly as she looked up.

“you surprised me, mr. raingstromn.  look at the mess i’ve made of the transcription. i must start afresh now, you realize,” she said, mildly chastising.

she ran the blotter over the parchment out of reflex, and contemplated if she truly did need to start over. perhaps she could work with the erratic line in the middle of the words. as long as the text was legible, cadence wasn’t broken during vocalization and focus would remain on intent. her hands moved slowly over the document, smoothing it down. the incantations contained within the text she was translating from were incredible. the one who wrote these words had to have been inspired by more than mortal thought.

he chuckled softly, as if picking up on her thoughts. she blushed again.

“my apologies. my man told me you would be here in the library going through transcriptions and working to catch up. i thought i would see what all the fuss has been about. is this the new acquisition?” he said, picking up the mouldy tome she was working from.

“yes, it is. it’s from Dante Alighieri himself. from what i can tell, it’s some early writing of what eventually was included in his ‘la divina commedia’. it’s in great shape despite how old it is. note the spine is still intact and the leather bindings only slightly decayed,” she said excitedly. “i’m having a devil of a time deciphering the text, though. it’s a mixture of old latin and a dialect of italian which is fairly obscure and i’m sure has not been seen in centuries. since dante is considered by some to be the father of the italian language, i guess that’s to be expected. it’s an exquisite find.”

“indeed. a real treasure,” he said, looking at her.

she started again, and looked down at his shoes. not that she didn’t enjoy looking into his eyes. they were warm, bright with fierce light, despite being a pale ice blue color. she couldn’t explain it but she felt as if she would lose herself in them if she looked too long. she was afraid of that prospect. eyes were windows to the soul, they say. with mr. raingstromn, she felt they were more a doorway, one behind which anything may lurk.

he set the book down, and took up a seat next to her desk. he sat back with a feline grace and grinned with perfectly white teeth.

“i’ve always wanted to ask you a question, but was afraid of being perceived as too forward,” he said.

“too late,” she quipped.

he laughed again, a little louder, though still soft enough to not carry too far beyond the transcription cubicle. while it was late, there were other analysts here working on their prospective works. silence was indeed a virtue here.

“touche. well. i shall ask the question then. your name. starr.” he said her name softly, as if savoring the syllables. “where did your parents come up with the name? does it have an origin somewhere… family or friend perhaps?”

she smiled slightly, then started arranging the items in front of her idly.

“ah. no, it’s not too personal of a question. i’ve had it asked of me rather often actually. my father told me when i was younger it was because my eyes contained the stars in them. when i got older, he told me where the name really came from. it was after a character in an old movie he was rather fond of growing up. the character was a wandering girl who was caught between monsters and madness. she fell for a young man who had fallen into the same circle she had but was determined to get out.  he said she sought redemption through her circumstances, salvation.”

she looked up and met mr. raingstromn’s gaze, and for a moment.  the silence was palpable between them. the earth seemed to hold its breath and pause for a heartbeat. there wasn’t a sound to be heard and the space between them seemed suffocating. then the clock resumed ticking in the distance, pens scratching across parchment was heard, and time resumed it’s course.

“redemption and salvation? lofty pursuits for a young woman,” said mr. raingstromn.

“i think it was more about finding a way out of her current circumstances. she tried pulling herself away from the monsters, but was bound to them against her will,” said starr.

“did you watch the movie after your father told you of it?”

“oh? yes. i did. i enjoyed it immensely. it’s one of my favorites now.”

“it reminds you of your father,” mr. raingstromn responded, more statement than question.

“yes, i suppose it does. he passed away not too long ago. much too early, in my opinion, but… well, things are the way they are,” she said softly.

he leaned forward and put his hand lightly on her shoulder. her sweater had fallen away and exposed her pale skin beneath. she felt the warmth from his gentle touch and fought the urge to lay her cheek against his fingers.

“my condolences,” he said quietly, gently squeezed her arm, then slowly sat back in his chair.

“thank you,” she said lamely.

gods, why was she acting like this, like some dewy-eyed school girl stammering as the quarterback jock noticed her? she noticed her breath and quickened, and her heart was beating slightly faster than before. she felt flushed, and her left hand went involuntarily to her neck. she wasn’t sure why. to cover her confusion, she continued moving her hand upward, and pushed her hair back behind her ear.

he put both hands on the arms of the chair he sat in, and leaned forward once more.

“i’ve made you uncomfortable. for that, i apologize.”

“no, no, you’re fine. i’m just… it’s been a rough year, that’s all,” she said.

he stood up and grinned.

“nevertheless, i apologize to you. please. allow me to make it up to you. join me for drinks in about an hour. i insist,” he said, as she started to protest. “finish up to the passage regarding the souls blown to and fro by the terrible winds of a violent storm, without hope of rest. from there, i shall rescue you from that fate, and hopefully make amends for my transgression. come down to the lobby of the building, and my man will meet you there. adieu for now.”

he inclined his head towards her, smiled and left the cubicle.  he made his way down the aisle and towards the elevator doors along the back wall. she followed him with her eyes until the doors opened and closed upon him. then, she softly breathed out the breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

“what are you getting yourself into, starr,” she muttered to herself.

she shook her head and went back to the page she was working on. she completed her work to the end of the passage,  up to the point mr. raingstromn had commented on. she painstakingly returned the reference text to it’s controlled storage container and cleaned up her workspace. double-checking she had everything secured, she picked up her transcriptions to place them in their envelope. as she looked down at the freshly inked pages, a thought occurred to her that almost caused her to drop everything. she froze as she stared at the words in jet black ink staring back. she sat down, numb for the moment, and looked into the distance as she came to terms with the realization.

mr. raingstromn had told her of ‘souls blown to and fro by terrible winds’ before she translated the text.

 

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November 14, 2011

daemon’s ilk

By cdpoe

daemon screamed as she was thrown into the brick wall.  the side of her head made a dull thud as it thwacked against the hard surface. she knew that was going to leave a mark and perhaps a grade-A concussion. the force rattled her teeth and she tasted salt and copper as she bit her tongue. she managed to keep her footing and avoid tumbling to the filth of the alley beneath her. she used the brick wall to support her, but she stood nonetheless. her breath hitched raggedly and she struggled to catch her breath. her long dirty blond hair hung down in thick coils wet with sweat. a thin raspy voice reached her from the darkness.

“isss that all you can muster, sweet thing? surely one of your repute is more worth an opponent than this. i did not traverse the Veil from the UnderDark to finish so easily… so quickly… sooooo sweeetly….”

the voice  felt sick and oily in her ears. her brain rebelled upon hearing it as did her stomach. she choked down the urge to vomit at her feet and felt dizzy from the effort. she cocked a half smile and responded.

“aw, c’mon, gimme a break, Grallbit. i’m just getting warmed up for ya.”

“you have such a sweeeeet smell about you, my dear daemon. the ambrosia of fear mixed with the aphrodesia of confusion. and is that a note of bittersweet sadness as well?” he crooned.

Grallbit was one of the Ilk that fed upon raw emotion. the stronger it was, the more power they drew from it. they would invoke terror through physical means. if they were looking for more, they would goad someone into revealing memories of sadness, sorry, anger, whatever. they would force a memory to the surface and play it out in full sensory detail. they would do this until the person either went insane or passed out dead from synaptic stress. she was trained to block this sort of psychic attack, and she attempted to do so.

“ahhhhh.  your sweet companion, partner in crime, your soul-sister… i sense that is the sssssource of the sssssorrow…” Grallbit said with almost sexual pleasure in his tone.

too late.

“NOOOooo!”

daemon pushed back from the wall and whipped her arms out in front of her as she did so. she pulled whatever energy she could find pooling under the asphalt, in the greasy dirt beneath, and willed it through her. a sickly green stream of light shot up from below, which was caught in her hands as they moved. she flung it in the direction of Grallbit and willed her intent: protection… warding… and if the force it meant intended harm… expulsion from the physical realm.

Grallbit shrieked in agony as the energy hit him and washed over his corporeal form. the sickly green had turned to bright white-blue, a purifying energy meant to cleanse anything “unlcean”.

“take that, you filthy bastard…” daemon gasped.

Grallbit relinquished instead of fighting her will. while he may be expunged from this realm as a result of her attack, he would simpy cease to exist here and revert to his normal state in whatever dank hole of the UnderDark he called home. if he chose to challenge her will, and lost, he risked not only the destruction of his physical body in this realm but the banishment of his being… elsewhere.  fragmented and not anchored to any realm, he would be forced to wander aimlessly In Between.

“next time, my sssssweeet morsel… next time… we shall share the exquissssite-ness of your pain,  your sorrow, and i shall slowly suck it all from your brain as marrow from a bone…” he whispered and whined both.

“lookin’… forward to it…” daemon panted.

Grallbit faded from the earthly realm, leaving only a puff of greasy smoke and the faint odour of rotting meat.

daemon collapsed to the ground. she was spent and knew she needed to get to safe haven soon. her psyche reeked of exhaustion. that spelled vulnerability which in turn spelled badnessn. lots of spelling. this meant other creatures of the UnderDark may come snarling around for a treat.

“oh, maira. i…”

she shook her head, regretting it as she did so. wincing in pain, she slogged off into the darkness.

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November 13, 2011

Parental Advisory: Explicit Thought Content

By cdpoe

i was inspired this evening to ramble a bit. facebook is awesome for that. i should use it more often cuz i have a lot of fodder to pull from. between the current political and economic climate, everyone’s a critic and seems to have all the answers as to what people coulda shoulda woulda have done. it’s great we have a voice in this country, don’t get me wrong. but the problem i find with many (in my own humble experience) is there seems to be a lot more finger pointing and blaming than there is sitting down and discussing an actual solution. yes, let’s spend hundreds of thousands, nay, millions of dollars blasting our opposition apart whether it be republican or democrat, liberal or conservative, and thus place our own agenda on a pedestal. oh, and by the way, that agenda has nothing to do with the common interest or good.  thank you for playing.  let’s expect the masses to buy into what we’re pedaling and hope no one notices there’s no actual progress towards resolving issues behind it.  let’s rule by the media, saturate it with pundits and commentators, who are obviously so successful because people simply start spewing what they hear on CNN, or Fox News, or NPR, or whatever cram-fest they tune into. few then turn around and look into it themselves or take the time to intelligently question what they hear. most will parade the party-line and assume it’s gospel.

when did we all of a sudden expect our ideologies to come directly from the media, whatever form it takes?

i assume that’s what is expected based upon the notion what people do or say comes from what they are exposed to in their daily lives. whether it’s movies, music, video games, toys, or other items pedaled by the media to the masses, we are told this might, nay, will affect what we say or do.  we seem to be expected to accept that our children will be destroyed by the media they watch, the games they play, the music they listen to and the toys they play with. we have parent watch-dog groups ranting and raving about violence and sexuality in media, individuals posting commentary about how toys are shaping post-childhood behaviors such as hate crime or prejudice, and the like. i’m sorry. i did not realize that the video game i just bought my son was going to be the sole influence on his developing ideology and other mental / emotional growth. i so missed the memo about the music he chooses to listen to being the only media that will shape how he sees the world and reacts to others around him. i thought i would <gasp> actually engage him in conversation and explain things in the world to him. to share ideas with him about conclusions i’ve arrived at in my life experience, but to emphasize that the world is a big place, and he needs to form his own opinions. i thought, silly me, i would actually talk to him about things occurring in school, politics, the world, his life, our life, the past, the present and even the possibilities in the future. i didn’t know that music, games, and toys will take care of all that. phew. that’s a load off. and if that is the case, then yes, i guess i need to make sure that i boycott games that aren’t all little puffy manga-eyed people cavorting in lavender and chartruse outfits in clouds, butterflies, and stars with smiley faces. i guess i need to make sure that lego set he buys isn’t turning him into a totalitarian dickhead. ia toy is a toy. a game is a game. tv is tv. music is music. don’t expect the toy, game, tv, or music to do your parenting for you. if you do… epic fail. if you are worried about any of this “shaping” your child, do something about it. talk to your kids.

my prior post on my Fb page is a great example, the youtube link to suicide commando’s ‘bind – torture – kill’.  to turn a phrase by the esteemed master of the self, yoda, ‘judge me by my music, do you?’ fine. whatever. if you think that’s what i’m all about, then so be it. how surprise you would be when i don’t bind you, torture you, kill you, and instead, i <gasp> engage in intelligent conversation about life, the universe, and everything (42, by the way). on the surface, yeah, many people would probably be rather frightened of me, if all they saw was the surface picture painted by media interests – games, music, and yes, toys. but that’s the rub. you need to get behind that surface picture, get through the consumerist bullshit and see what really is behind the person, not the objects. don’t preach until you know what your truly preaching against, cuz 9 times out of 10, you’ll be way off base.

i remember watching an Mtv awards performance in 2006 (i think) where eminem was performing at. he was introduced by jim carey, which was awesome in and of itself. jim started off briefly with an intro, funny as always, bantering about why he was even there, not being a musical artist (as he belted out a line from ‘jesus christ superstar’). he says he didn’t want to do it, until he found out he was introducing eminem. and he says “rebellion? you know, he scares me… he scares me a little… i gotta be honest.  i enjoy his music, but he scares me. his lyrics are totally socially unacceptable, but if we just spend a little time with our kids, we’ll be okay.”

and that’s just it. historically and culturally, some of the most influential and significant changes in our world came from the outrageous, the unexpected, and the (at the time) socially unacceptable. it makes people think. it makes people take notice and actually see what’s going on around them, but, and here’s the kicker, take notice and think… for… yourself. don’t react against the catalyst. don’t snuff it, push it down, repress it, ban it, censor it. find out what generates that reaction and use it creatively as a catalyst for your own change. do you think it really is that big of an influence? do something about it. but if you simply don’t like it or don’t agree with it – don’t partake. don’t like the video games? don’t play ‘em. don’t like the music? don’t listen to it. don’t agree with abortion? don’t have one. don’t like the artwork? don’t look at it. don’t like <insert whatever here>? then don’t <insert appropriate action not to take here>. the list goes on. but don’t spoil it for the rest of us heathens who are going to (according to some) end up shooting our classmates, gunning down people in mcdonald’s, or sniping people on the highway because of the music and video games.

bottom line: people, if you allow tv, games, music, movies, or any other media to solely rule and shape what you are… epic fail. if we just spend a little time with our kids and ourselves, we’ll be okay. so sayeth jim carey.

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November 11, 2011

resurrection ex machina

By cdpoe

“are you nuts?” marcus hissed.

“what? it’s been done before. it can be done again,” thomas said.

actually, he really wasn’t sure it could be done again. there wasn’t a handy chilton guide for the things.  the surviving texts and documentation regarding the arkangels was spotty at best. there were huge gaps in the chronology. some content was so badly aged, it could not be reconstructed. other source texts were flat out missing vital portions.  it all had to be gathered from scrolls, personal journals, and tomes, all of which had sat undisturbed and hidden from the mainstream clergy for centuries.

“yeah, but at what cost? have you read some of the accounts afterwards? dementia. lunacy. and those were the most positive. holy christ, thomas,” marcus said, crossing himself at the last statement.

“well, yeah. but this… this is different,” thomas retorted lamely.  “i’m doing a final workup of the ritual, and begin fasting in preparation tomorrow. that’s all there is for it.”

“i admire your intentions, thomas, i do. don’t doubt that for a second. i just don’t understand why you think this is the course of action that must be taken. surely the Church’s Guard Primoris can handle any sort of onslaught that occurs, physical or ethereal.”

“i would like to think so. they’ve staved off all that has befallen us in the past, praise be. i just feel this time truly is different. there is something about all this i cannot explain. i feel it in my bones when i’m laying down to sleep. at the cusp of waking, at the point where i’m neither asleep nor awake, it’s there. a feeling. something just out of reach,” thomas said.

marcus was silent for a moment, pondering this. he had known thomas since first year at seminary. they were boarded together and were roommates until they both took their vows. he had always known thomas to be the quiet and reserved type, never speaking out of turn on anything. thomas had his convictions, and never swayed from them, but was not one to push on others. missionary work was not his strong suit as a result. he did not hide his light under a bushel basket, to quote a phrase, but neither did he go out of his way to ‘convert’ anyone. to see thomas in such a state about this was disconcerting. it frightened him a bit, even. not because thomas was pushing this, but because thomas sensed it was necessary to push it.

marcus looked away then back to thomas; he started to speak, paused, then grinned.  he clasped thomas’ hands firmly and then pulled him into an embrace.

“may the one god and those under him smile upon you, blessing your accomplishment with success. i think it’s insane to even try. but, at least that would mean you have already lost your sanity, and therefore you have nothing to lose.”

thomas returned the embrace warmly.

“i am glad to hear it. truly. we’ve known each other a long time, and i knew i could count on your counsel. the celestials have their champions, both god and demigod alike. the elementals have forces of nature to call upon, amalgums of earth, air, fire, water.  the sub tenebrae have their creatures. for us… what do we have? we need champions ourselves, powered by the raw forces upon which all the faction draw their own energy.  we need beings that can engage our opponents with equal force, but who answer to only our will and no other god, goddess, creature or being. we need the arkangels, marcus. pray it is enough.”

marcus nodded, and walked away from his friend and brother-in-spirit, praying as he went.

 

 

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November 4, 2011

the Librarian and the Chronicle introduced

By cdpoe

the Librarian was infinite and eternal. he/she had no real identity other than simply the Librarian. those who sought the Librarian would eventually find it’s repository of knowledge, if they persisted. each tale told on how the repository was found differed greatly, and many an argument ensued over the discrepancies. some insisted it was a perilous journey over unknown oceans fraught with exotic dangers. others insisted it was a deadly sojourn over parched deserts choked with sandstorms. the repository itself also varied from story to story. in some accounts, it was a digital library with vast caches of data stored in chilled server farms accessed via virtual terminal interface. others described deep underground floors lit dimly with countless musty tomes, scrolls and artifacts. from all accounts told, knowledge was downloaded, read, written, inked, drawn, signed and sung worlds over.

often times, references to the Librarian’s repository of information bled into human-kind’s recorded history. the great Royal Livrary of Alexandria is one such physical incarnation. The Temple of the Moon in Huayna Picchu, Peru was another such location. The legendary treasure of the Knights Templars is believed by some to be a treasure of knowledge vs. precious metal or artifact. The last scholarly agreed upon location of this treasure was the Temple of Solomon in Jerusalem. all of these sites provide tangible clues to the vast collection of knowledge protected by the Librarian. historical accounts show these locations destroyed, lost or faded into obscurity. however this is merely a way for mankind to rationalize away the layers of their own history swallowed by time’s murky cover.

one reference which is constant, never wavering in its description and content is that of The Chronicle of the Black Book.

the Chronicle documents all of mankind’s history, from beginning to end.  all that was, is, and will be is contained herein.  for every man and woman who may be privileged enough to view the book, his or her journey and imprint upon the fabric of time is contained.  there are beings who have been care-takers and oracles of this knowledge.  ‘weavers of the fates of man’ are told in many mythologies throughout the world over, willing to reveal these fates – for a price.  many argue they do not believe in fate, that nothing is set in stone.  they maintain that one determines their own fate by the decisions they make as they go through life and these decisions in turn determine the future.  and they would be correct.  for the Chronicle contains not only what has been, is, and will be, but all iterations of these paths.  every choice and decision made by an individual is captured in it’s vastness.  thus, the path revealed to the witness depends upon which incarnation of that witness is present.  and so, all that can be told of all realms is held within the pages of the Chronicle…

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October 15, 2011

Metamorphic Revelatory Crap… and Stuff

By cdpoe

its been awhile since i posted. there are many reasons, most a combination of time lack and avoidance. i was going to limit these postings to just personal art or writing related pieces, and the occasional art slash writing related media. i was going to avoid personal opinion related items, save a few exceptions, mainly to avoid people thinking “ooh, is he talking about me? what does he mean by that? what?”.

well, that’s gonna change.

there’s a lot of things i may simply want to ‘blog’ about or rant just ’cause. i try to avoid using Fb for that because i don’t feel social network means political, social and/or religious grand standing. yes, the word social was used in that last statement. however, it was coupled with grand standing, not network. if you want to connect because we don’t see each other due to geographic restrictions, or because it’s easier to share day-to-day things, that’s networking. if you’re pushing the most-of-you-won’t-post-this bullshit, the 21st century equivalent of chain letter crap, or related items, that’s not networking (to me). yes, you are free to express it on anywhere, including Fb. and i am free to say that’s crap. and, for the record, food pics are okay. so there.

anyway. thanks for listening. and you want to hear the irony? this will be forwarded as a link to my Fb page.

awesome.

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August 13, 2011

Sunshine and a Cafe

By cdpoe

getting out of the car, i noticed the heat wasn’t as oppressive as i thought it would be, and there was a pleasant breeze.  the air still smelled of warm asphalt and dust, but there was a hint of eucalyptus which was oddly comforting.  i walked out from the shade of the parking garage, and out into the blinding sunlight.  my eyes had to adjust, even behind the sunglasses, but that was okay.  looking across the street i felt a twinge of nostalgia as i looked at the old library building which is now the children’s theatre.  i looked out across from there and saw the new government offices building adjacent to the public library.  walking with distracted steps as i looked back and forth at the buildings, i glanced up and saw the balcony area of the library where many an orc and dark servant of mordor was slain.  i grinned remembering many a middle earth role-playing campaign unfolding up there.

across the street, behind the old library, was an alcove with bench seats bordering a grassy area where my RPG gaming career was born.  it was 1986 and i remember i was on the 2nd floor of the library in my favorite corner, reading a choose-your-own-adventure type book.  it was like an RPG in a book; you rolled up a character at the beginning and played through the story, rolling 10 sided die as you went.  it was kinda neat.  i had always been a fan of fantasy fiction and choose-your-own-adventure books were my favorites.   i don’t think they even have those anymore . i haven’t see them at least.  some kid and his brother were up there, and they came over to the table.  i didn’t recognize them (they went to the public school, whereas i was a catholic school victim) and was immediately filled with trepidation.  i was a rather inward focused child, awkward at best in front of strange kids, especially those of the opposite sex.  almost to the point it was painful.  i gulped, clenched the book tightly with my now white-knuckled fingers, and pretended not to notice their approach.  the older one spoke.  he wore a Led Zeppelin t-shirt, had longish stringy hair, and was an 8th grader.  he asked if i wanted to try something cooler than the choose-your-own-adventure stuff.  i kinda stammered over the response, but said sure, why not.  we spent the rest of that afternoon rolling up an Advanced D&D barbarian character, right up until i had to go home.

awesome.

walking  down the block towards downtown, i see Phoenix Books and Boo Boo Records in the same old spaces they were before i moved away many years ago.  continuing on down i can see where Muzzio’s Delicatessen was and had been since 1888.  the building was condemned and Muzzio’s had to move out of it’s old location.  i found a new Muzzio’s a couple blocks over, but it was under construction on the inside.  there was a 3′x3′ square sign on the window for some japanese sushi place; i couldn’t tell if it used to be the sushi place and was going to become Muzzio’s or vice versa.

it’s amazing how places can change so radically but remain the same simultaneously.  you can see the new business bristling out onto the sidewalks, their newer facades bright and shiny.  the older business, some with the exact same marquees as so many years ago, are still nestled in there oh so subtly.  entire parts of a block are now a bustling mall-like centerpiece with an Amberdumbie & Filth, Peet’s Coffee & Tea, Barnes & Noble and a cinema.  but at various points there are old haunts that proclaim their solidarity with a stoic pride, like Woodstock’s Pizza, Moondoggie’s Surf & Skate, and the aforementioned music and book stores.  i remember walking these streets almost exactly a year ago with my wife and son, which is a trip.  i took Forrest into Moondoggie’s and bought him a genuine Moondoggie’s t-shirt, which he was thrilled about.  the guy who owns and ran the place back in the day was still there, and while he didn’t remember me in particular, he remembered some of the crowd i ran with at that time in the late 80s slash early 90s.  i wanted to take them both to Country Culture Frozen Yogurt, but it had shut down literally just less than a week before we got there.  that was a bummer.

we ended up an Linnaea’s Cafe, which is where i am sitting now enjoying an iced chai tea latte and homemade strawberry shortcake as i write this.  Forrest got an orange cream italian soda, i got an iced mocha, and Corey got a Thai iced tea.  that particular day was rather hot, so the drinks were nice and refreshing.  we sat in the very back where the gardens are.  it’s a little grotto of brick and adobe, surrounded by ivy and various smallish trees and shrubs.  the former is crawling up the brick walls of the adjacent business; it’s really a closed off alleyway created by all the buildings the cafe is sandwiched within.  the shade offered some cool relief and there was a slight breeze.  birds flitted from the branches of the trees and bees hummed in the lavender pots in the far corner.  i told Corey and Forrest how i used to come down to Linnaea’s in the morning before school for a slice of coffee cake and rice pudding.  both were still hot, as they had just arrived from Linnaea’s kitchen at home.  the rice pudding was usually gone within the first hour of her opening.  we were lucky to arrive in town for school half an hour before she opened.

groovy stuff.

‘fly me to the moon’ sung by Frank Sinatra is playing softly in the background now, and i think i shall draw my narrative to a close.  the wind is flowing steadily from the back door to the front, and the clank of the occasional fork against a plate or spoon in a cappuccino cup is providing a drowsy bit of white noise.  cheers, folks, and adieu for now.

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